July 30, 2010

Life In Pause

The door was closed and so you left. You left in such a hurry, you didn't have time... Not even a second to say goodbye to me. And I waited for you, making a fool out of myself until I couldn't bear anymore. Until I got tired of the hours wasted next to the door. Waiting for someone who would never come back again. You were gone.... You went too far away... I can't even remember how we started the argument. What and whom it was about. I just remember you telling me you couldn't take it anymore, that I played with fire... with you. And I slapped your face in that very precise moment. Not because of what you said wasn't truthful, but because of how strong you said it. It seemed to me that you had rehearsed all those words that you had kept in your heart for centuries, and you had just decided to show your talent... You got smacked because of that. Because you didn't speak up earlier what you felt. For taking all this to a point with no turning back. And that was how you left our home. Couldn't you say how you hated being with me before you left?! Couldn't you at least criticize me in front of my face that I was a pain in the ass?! You had to leave me. And you had to do it in such a hurry... We had problems. Everybody does and argues about everything... Yes, I was a control freak and spent more time in my life than yours. But didn't we have our lives crossed with each other? If so, why did we have to separate our lives, what's mine and yours? Weren't you happy for me, for my achievements? Or am I the one who has been confusing all this? I don't know about anything anymore... I don't feel like telling stories. Because the story of my life is paused... And I don't know when will I be able to find someone who will listen and have the energy to be part of it... I miss you. I miss those ridiculous arguments and your silliness... Come back. I promise I'll have more time to listen to you even when you say something I don't like at all... Come back... Come home... yea?

July 23, 2010

Airline Mileage

Airline mileage: the distance in miles between two terminals in a network.

- Sir, congratulations! You're our first passenger achieving 2200 miles! And in order to thank you for your constant support, we're offering you our premier superior deluxe service! You're welcomed to share this with your beloved one and earn even more miles together!

A curious passenger jumps in and says: "congratulations! I wish I could taste such prize with my husband...too bad he's always busy... so, how many miles have you made with your woman then?".

330 miles... And right in that exact moment, all he could think of was going back home as soon as possible, and tell her: let's make more miles together, regardless of where we might go, how we might look... as long as our hands are still holding on each other...

June 23, 2010

The Light Of My Day












The alarm is on at 10 o’clock in the morning. I open my eyes for a moment and think to myself if I should sleep for a bit longer. But I can’t. Because I don’t feel like it. Because I just can’t.I wake up and look in the mirror. I can’t see myself. I don’t want to look at myself. And so I’m off to have a shower and stay there for half an hour dreaming with my eyes wide open what has already been dreamed yesterday. I get dressed in a hurry not knowing the reason behind all this madness. And I leave the house. I look in the sky and see stars. Invisible and sleepy stars. I hang around in the narrow streets and think of my shopping list. I want everything. Why not? There’s no reason why I can’t have what I want. Or maybe there is, but it’s me who doesn’t want to accept it. I want nothing... People pass me by. They all have lively eyes. All filled with hope for being alive for one more day. Except me. I’m the only one with despair in mine. I don’t know where to go. Because I’m alone. I’m so lost in my own home. I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t have the slightest idea of what I’m saying either as nothing makes sense anymore. Nothing is worth of my time to look at when you're not around. Simply because nothing compares to you. To your unconditional love you’ve got for me. I need you. I need you to wake me up everyday with your sweet kisses... exclusively for me. And only so I have the notion of where to go, what I want.

June 10, 2010

The Sound Of Nature

It's raining heavily
and here I am
trying to write something
that's worth a moment
of yours to read it
and each time
I see those lightnings,
images come to my mind
blurry at first...
someone once told me
"thunders awake thoughts and memories"
and to that, I replied
"well, only the unwanted, unpleasant ones"
and after saying that
he smiled and didn't say anything further
I thought I was right
until now
it's when I hear the thunders
those sweet images come up to me
every single bit and taste of those
vivid experiences comes to life
so yes he was right,
thunders really awake thoughts and memories
but not just the unwanted, unplesant ones.

June 04, 2010

Her Moment Of Truthfulness

From the very moment they kissed, she knew he was the one. The one who would never let her out again. The one who would never give her back herself. The one and only one. They got married a few years later and had a kid. Everything seemed perfect like one of those family portraits most people have in their houses, with perfect shining smiles from everyone, except from every heart. There's always something hidden behind those smiley faces. And perhaps, that's the beauty of it.

He started to get home late. Excuses were more and more frequent. And so were the lies told to her. She no longer slept with arms wrapped around her waist. The bed was cold and too big. His heart was further away from her, even though they both pretended nothing was wrong, nothing was completely wrong. Because even a stopped clock is right twice a day. And so she kept on walking holding her man's hand but not feeling his skin. It was too strange to her already. His eyes, his lips, his face were no longer the same. She even thought it could had been her who changed. Maybe she didn't give much attention to the family. Didn't consider enough her husband and daughter. Didn't satisfy him enough in many aspects.

Maybe it was really time to make up for what was lost, she thought. But how? Well, by agreeing with most of the things he said. By caring more his feelings and do whatever he requested, forgetting her own ones. By putting her man first. And that means forgetting, once again, herself. She tried and tried but didn't succeed. He became even more reluctant to her. Tried even harder to stay away from her, beautifying each escape with different excuses. She told herself to be patient. To wait and see. Afterall, good things never come easy, she thought. Still nothing.

Until one day, when she was at the supermarket deciding which peanut butter he would like this time, she saw him standing there. All she could see was her man's fingers embracing someone else's in the exact way a few years ago she experienced herself. He looked shocked but didn't show a slight hint of worriness. And that was it. She payed and left the place. Was very angry. Unbelievably mad. Worst of all, a very bitter feeling. But then, as time went by, she was relieved. She was starting to feel herself back into that body. Her soul that was gone long ago.

Now, I don't have to carry any guilty feeling of being a bad wife. Now I've all the time for myself and my little princess. And now I no longer need to buy peanut butter because I never really liked it in the first place.

May 23, 2010

Sing Me A Song

I pop in to this shop
cd's are everywhere
people are talking
songs are playing
I wonder around
not sure what I'm looking for
until I hear someone singing
and out of a sudden
there ain't no more album covers
nobody else
and no more words
except the ones
coming out from his lips
and here I am
at the 9th avenue
thinking to myself:
yes, this is the song, this is the perfect song.

May 19, 2010

The Problem Of...












Misunderstandings lead to arguments.
Explanations are needed but only if they are done rightly.
Otherwise assumptions are brought up and so are expectations.
Which will get to each other's nerves and the need for the always-unwelcome frustration and unreasonable attitude.
And at the end will only lead to more arguments as the consequence of such a world full of complicated words and emotions.

No more words. No more words. No more words. Keep them to yourself. And let them rest.