Inside A Bubble

I don't know what is going on. I feel like I have no hold of myself, my thoughts and my actions. The world seems so confusing and promising that I no longer know if this is real or mere fantasy. No. I'm lying. This place where I'm living doesn't promise me anything but neither is it confusing. My actions, thoughts and myself are well controlled. No, again, it's not true. Let me put it this way: my actions are not controlled because my thoughts are often too complex for such a simple minded self to understand and as a consequence, it causes misunderstandings and contradictory actions as a way of my thoughts' reaction generated by myself. I'm tired. If you're out there, tell me something I don't know just yet.