Letters

I woke up and you weren't next to me. All I could see was an empty pillow with only a few of your hair laying on it. I pulled your pillow and the duvet close to me so I could inhale your smell. That smell was so you. Only you have it. I felt like shit knowing that you were once there, but there was no way I could see you, hold you, kiss you in that precise moment. I missed you then. I missed you like hell. I missed you like I never missed anyone else.

When I was wandering around with my thoughts, I remembered the letters I wrote to you but never had the courage to send them because they just weren't good enough... Because you deserve so much more...
















23rd of September, 2010

The nights are becoming longer which means it's taking me longer to fall asleep. There could be a million reasons why I can't just close my eyes and sleep like any other creature. But none of them beats the fact that it's because of you. Because you aren't next to me. Not that you make me fall asleep. Is the sense that the person I care and love the most is actually next to me. Right next to me so I can look at him and feel the safest, the luckiest person in the world... Is the sense that whenever I have nightmares I can feel your arms wrapped tightly around me, making me able to fall asleep again... Is the sense that in case I suddenly wake up, I can look at your face and kiss your lips without you knowing... And I crave for all that... I miss you... I miss spending every day and night with you here at 395... Come back home please.


23rd of October, 2010

Another month's gone. Time passes by in such a slow motion. I need you here. I need you. My head is hurting and I'm really close to explode... You're my drug... The only remedy to keep me alive... Yes, you've got a tremendous responsibility on your shoulders... And I'm tied to you now... So please, keep drugging me just like the past year and 2 months...


I don't need to write you letters anymore... Simply because you deserve to hear them when your eyes cross with mine.