Sleepless Nights

I try not to think about it,
about anything.
I try really hard to forget
about everything.
So I force my mind to be blank
and stay it that way,
but I fail.
I pretend I'm relaxed
and just let go of my mind
to think whatever it wants to.
But it gets stuck and
turns out to be worse than before.
I open my eyes and
close them again.
Everything is so dark yet
I'm able to look around me.
I close them and
I can hear my own breathing.
It's loud,
so loud under the cold silence.
And now,
I am tense.
My heartbeat is intensifying.
I can't.
I can't...
I can't sleep.